Dearest Therry Dawn,
I
am honored to have been asked to write a letter to you as you celebrate this milestone;
your 80th birthday. You asked
me to share from my perspective, “how to spend the remaining years of your
life.” Please receive these reflections
as my hopes for you.
At this point in my life, I wonder what it might
be like to be 80, and I am hopeful freedom comes with age. I am 37.
I am an ordained clergy woman in
the United Methodist Church working full-time serving in a leadership position
on our conference staff. I am the mother
of 3 beautiful girls: 7 year old twins
and a 2 ½ year old. I am the PTO
president. I am a dedicated volunteer teaching
Sunday school, volunteering in the children’s ministry, and preaching or leading
in worship when colleagues need a break.
Most of my days begin at 5:30 AM and each moment is well planned and
scheduled. I feel the pressure of time
trying to get my tasks accomplished and enjoy my family as much as
possible. I constantly seek balance
where I aim for success and advancement in my career while maintaining devotion
and time for my family. I imagine that
at 80, the pressure for career success will no longer be a priority. I long for the day, when I can sit a little
longer with a diet coke in my hand and soak in the beauty of God’s creation. I imagine the morning, when I no longer set
an alarm clock and feel freed to stay up until midnight, as you do, because the
morning doesn’t have to be so hurried and rushed. My hope for you is that you take hold of the freedom
your stage of life offers, so that your days may be filled with life-giving
moments. I hope you will fill the time
with the activities you enjoy and that you will travel to the places of your
dreams. I hope you embrace time as a
gift that provides you experiences and memories.
I hope that as you approach the rest of your life, you will not succumb
to the feeling that “there is nothing else that I can give to this world.” You still have plenty to offer. In 2011, the late Maya Angelou posted on her
Facebook page,
“My mission in life is not merely to survive,
but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and
some style."
Angelou was 83 when she wrote this mission
statement. I believe this statement
showed her intentionality towards not succumbing to the thought that her life
was over, rather she embraced that there was much life still to be lived. I hope you will find ways to thrive with passion,
compassion, humor, and style. I hope you
will continue to offer service to our world giving of yourself to the social
causes that you are passionate about and that you will remain a faithful member
of your prayer group (which I understand you have been part of for over 30
years). I hope you will offer compassion
and love to all you encounter and that you love the least, last and lost you
encounter at places like the soup kitchen where you go to serve each Tuesday. I hope you will laugh at yourself and at the trivialities
of life. A former parishioner who was well
into her 80s called all the members of the church on their birthday. She even continued to call me, her former
pastor, on my birthday. I looked forward
to this birthday call, where her sweet voice would tell me how much she loved
me and how much she celebrated my life. I
asked her about these calls and she responded, “There is very little I can do
for my church, but I can pick-up my
phone and make calls.” Her birthday
calls were a passionate offering of love to the world. To her the phone call seemed insignificant,
but on my most recent birthday it was greatly missed as she has now joined the
church triumphant. My hope for you is to offer the world yourself, your gifts,
and your passion. Let it become your
mission.
I imagine that as you turn 80, you find yourself looking back in
reflection. I hope as you look back, you
do so with a deep sense of gratitude for all that life has offered. Celebrate where you have been and what you have done and quickly
pass over those times of disappointment or regret. I am very aware that your 80 years of life
tell many stories and those stories are held in the recesses of your heart and
mind. Perhaps you will consider putting
them into writing or sitting with a recorder nearby, so that generations to
come may have access to the stories. You
told me recently, how my great-grandmother and other women from our family were woman
before their time thinking and talking of theology. You shared how my grandmother and her twin
sister graduated high school different years but both as valedictorian. I want to know stories, such as
this,
and I hope you will spend your final years bringing those stories to life in writing or recording. I imagine this will be a challenge you will
enjoy as I know your love for history, genealogy and story. Though we may seem uninterested at times,
please do not grow weary in passing-on the narrative of your life.
I imagine that as you look towards the remaining
years of your life, you become more grateful for the people God has allowed you
to know and love in life. In these years
ahead, spend your time with them. Spend
quality time with them and make sure they know how much you love them and open
your ears to hear their love in return.
Today’s celebration is a great starting place. You have gathered those you love in one place
to celebrate life and the gift that you are to one another. May these celebrations continue! As you reflect over the people in your life,
if you should think of someone you have hurt or have been hurt by, I pray that
you will seek reconciliation. May your
years not be spent harboring resentment, but may you be freed to love as you
are surrounded by the people you love. I
am sure you will reflect on those who have gone before you and now have
received their eternal reward. May their
lives continue to live in you and may you find comfort in remembering that you
will meet again.
My final hope for you is found in the one who
knit you together in your mother’s womb, who promises to never leave or forsake
you, who knows the very number of hairs on your head, and who loves you with an
unconditional and eternal love. I hope
that as you look towards the last years of your life, that you will continue to
stay in love with God. We cannot
predict what life might offer, and yet we can trust that God will be with
us. Your faith in God has sustained you
throughout these 80 years, and I trust that it will sustain you in the days and
years ahead. Today we give God thanks
for your life and for the privilege it is to share this journey with you. I regret that the busy nature of my own life
prevented me from celebrating in person, but I hope you receive my words as a
token of my love and a sign of gratitude for your life.
May the Lord bless you and keep you.
May the Lord make his face to shine upon you
and be gracious unto you.
May the Lord lift up his countenance upon you
and give you peace.
Amen and Happy Birthday!
