I
really don’t like packing, and I tend to procrastinate as long as possible (for
instance I should be packing to head to Lake Junaluska and instead am writing a
blog about packing). This time of the
year many United Methodist clergy are busy packing their lives to move from one
appointment to the next. This year, I am
among those clergy. My packing for this
move is limited to my office and yet the boxes are inevitable. The boxes sat in my office for several weeks
and I finally decided to add stuff to them on Thursday. At first, it seemed so easy: commentaries in this box, theology in this
box, leadership books in another box and so on, and then it came to the
stuff: the pictures, the notes, the
figurines, etc. It was one of the first
time that emotions were tied to this move.
I looked at the picture of the woman I call “my Shelby mom” standing with
me at the dead sea; the “You are Special” plaque that was gifted to me by my
homeless neighbor Carl who often stopped by my office hoping for a ride to “Pindale,”
the note from a candidate for ministry who thanked me for helping him discern
God’s call, the picture of me and the senior pastor I worked with for 5 years wearing
our balloon hats and bright orange Faith and Fun Fest t-shirts, and the picture
of me wearing my butterfly stole standing in front of a beautiful flowered
cross on Malcolm Blvd. Placing these
items one-by-one into the box brought tears and a flood of memories.
I remember hearing Bishop McCleskey liken itinerancy
to packing boxes, calling a moving van, unpacking boxes, and then waiting until
it was time to pack boxes again. His explanation
was not meant to be so cut and dry, rather it was to help remind clergy that itinerancy
is part of who we are. We are called to
be people on the move. Our call to pack
and move originates in a biblical call to go where God leads us and to follow and
trust. As the tears streamed down my
face, I reflected on how much richer my life is for having journeyed to
Liberty, Newton, Shelby, Rutherford College, Charlotte and Gastonia. My call has extended my family to include
relationships with parishioners and colleagues I have served with along the
way. My call to pack and move has taken
me outside the comfortable and my life is forever changed because I chose to
follow and trust.
This year, God’s call is leading me back to the local
church. For the last four years, I have
served on our conference staff working with candidates for ministry and clergy
on their ordination journey. My life has
been made richer through the relationships formed and through witnessing the deep
commitment folks are making for the church and the passion by which they live
out their call. I have stepped outside
my comfort zone to help order the life of the conference and the church at
large and my life is forever changed.
And yet, these last years I have grieved over not preaching and teaching
weekly and not administering the sacraments with regularity or planning and
leading passion filled worship week in and week out. I have missed being called “Pastor.” And just as God called me to this season on
conference staff, I have heard the call to “go and serve.” I recommit myself to God’s call trusting that
God has amazing things in store at a new appointment.
At the end of the day on Thursday, I had emptied one
bookshelf and packed several boxes. The
procrastination was over and the transition was underway. I AM
an itinerant clergy. Myers Memorial will
make my life richer and I will not be the same.
There will be new pictures, new notes, new friends, and new memories waiting
to fill my bookshelves and my heart.
